Twin Flames

Proceed with caution!

In the  April 2025 news I talked about soulmates and how we can have hundreds of soulmates anywhere at anytime. I then said that it’s twin flames that are the big one and that the subject is an entirely different conversation. Here is that conversation, but proceed to read this with caution.

Why with caution?

If you’re reading this for more information about soul connections and to fill your spiritual knowledge bucket then crack on. If you’re healing from heartbreak or desperately searching for something or someone then be real about how you take this.

It can go one of two ways I think. You can either make your situation fit what I’m about to tell you, or make you feel even more at a loss.

When the workshop module came up in my development for Soulmates & Twin Flames, I had just separated from my husband. It wasn’t the greatest time to be in an online classroom talking about – how you know people are soulmates?, how to keep a soulmate and how the twin flame saga presents itself.

Why Twin Flame saga?

I remember sitting there in so much pain, being told numerous times that I have to heal to find my true power (which is true), it all seemed so far off. Then to be told that IF I have this one true indescribable connection with someone, then there are steps of what I could only think of as unwelcome additions of drama to my life. I was sat head in hands asking why can’t things just be easy and lovely straight off? I pinky promise I’ll appreciate it if there’s just no exhausting drama.

But no. We know we don’t work like that .. so here you go.

What is a Twin Flame?

Where you can have hundreds of soulmates as friends and partners, you can only have one twin flame. Twin flame relationships may not even last forever. Don’t panic yet – there’s more.

Twin flame relationships are very rare. Not everyone has a twin flame, I remember in my exhausted funk thinking I hope I don’t. I’m quite happy here thank you.

Twin flames are two halves of one soul. They mirror each other in qualities and experiences, and are there to teach us to love unconditionally. The feeling of coming home, belonging and totally complete happens. It’s not just what you’d call a happy relationship, it smashes that out of the water.

So here’s what happens….. you’d better buckle up buttercup.

Ten steps to the Twin Flame experience

If you Google it you’ll find different explanations and sequences, and so it’s important to know that you shouldn’t overthink them, or get bogged down in them. Some teachings are 7 steps, some are 15. I’m going for a cheeky 10. They say similar things it just depends on what resonates as a step. Mirroring is a common occurrence. You just need to go along your journey and enjoy the relationships that you have. These are rough guidelines, it’s a SUPER BRIEF outline, and it’s not an absolute.

1. Happily unaware until..

You are happily trundling along your journey and unaware of a higher dimensional experience until I slide into your emails with this little gem. You might feel incomplete, but happy with what you have and that’s enough.

One day something changes. You begin searching for something but don’t know what. It’s an overwhelming feeling. It’s like nothing is clear. I don’t want to be here, but I don’t know where I want to be. Do I want an apple or an orange? Do I even like fruit? Am I even hungry?

2. The Twin Flame search begins

You start trying to find your path and because it’s so overwhelming you reach out to friends who don’t understand fully.

You’ll find activities and people to fill the void.

You’ll cross paths with other people who have had a similar awakening/journey, or mediums like me to confirm or point to the direction of your path. This also happens in spiritual awakenings when you have a soul purpose or job to do, it’s not always because you are on the search for a twin flame. You might also be hurting after a break up and want to know you won’t be alone forever. That’s all different.

The answer feels within reach but you can’t quite touch it.

You know who you’re looking for. You might even detail it in your journal, or started manifesting them in. It’s like you want the Disney reality of happy ever after, after one kiss in the woods.

There are people that you are happy with but there’s something missing.

3. The test experiences

You may encounter the one. The connection is there. You’ve been searching for each other since birth so chances are the meetings happen but you’re not ready or the energy makes you confused. If at this stage you do acknowledge it, you’ll test boundaries.

The most likely outcome is that you will move away from one another.

4. The ripples

This is where you can go down into a depression or feeling of grief because you’re not getting what you need from a current partner or your situation.

Something traumatic or painful happens to your twin and the ripples reach out to you. When you meet and start talking you may realise that you’re dark times occurred when they were going through something.

5. Making room

Your eyes are now open. The journey to healing and self improvement begins. You know that something is coming but don’t know what. You’re getting ready for THE meet.

6. The meet

This will be different for everyone. It’s going to hit you like a slo mo backwards thrust after punch to the gut in a super hero movie (including reverb sound effect).

Except it’s not like in the movies. You’re going to expect love at first sight when realising your twin flame. You might actually not like each other. Feelings of hate and love are intense, but not opposite. You have to have feelings for someone to hate them.

One twin might be spiritually awake and the other one not. They’re so overwhelmed or hurt by past encounters that they don’t know what they’re looking for.

You could get physical really quickly and it feels like you’ve always known each other. It’s like something that’s never been before.

You may have all three reactions. But you know what’s coming, the next ride is not so easy. Sorry I couldn’t help it.

7. The Twin Flames connection

So you’ve met. You’ve annoyed the hell out of each other or had some magical moments. Once it’s got physical here’s how it goes.

You talk and divulge things in complete comfort like never before. All of your vulnerabilities are out there. You almost can’t stop talking. There’s no judgement or ego. This is the living breathing fairy tale.

All of the signs and ‘coincidences’ start coming to light. The things that brought you together. You may see more angel numbers. There are alignments.

There’s an obsession, although not a toxic obsession. There might even be obstacles in the way, but these mean nothing.

This of course is going to be overwhelming. Emotions are going to rise high. You’ve opened up really quickly and now you’re screwed.

You might not even be able to pin point why fight or flight is kicking in. It’s because we’re not conditioned for this type of connection. We’re not prepared for it and in reality we all know from experience that Disney is not real. What’s happening?

What should we do? I know!…..

8. Run!

This stage is extremely painful. You’re welcome.

You’re exposed for all the good and bad.

Something higher is at work here so there’s nothing you can do about it.

It’s common that there is a runner and a chaser but not always.

The runner will give themselves a narrative that fits to enable them to run away. It most likely won’t be a true narrative, but they’ll believe it.

If you run then it will all disappear and you won’t have to deal with it.

This has no set timeline. I don’t know if you’ve read the book or watched the film and TV series ‘The One’. It can go on for years. There will be fake twin flame relationships. Doubt. Times of getting back together then splitting again.

The chaser if there is one will chase as the thought of losing this connection is unbearable. You’ve bared all, you’ve had the most amazing open conversations. The biggest belly laughs. What the heck?

This is an important time to focus on your own journey and healing. Don’t read these words and think well they are supposed to run and I am supposed to chase. You get back to being at peace with yourself.

This process is important! It’s a lesson in learning to love yourself. If you have had readings with me or seen my lives I’m often saying that someone else should add to your happiness not be the creator of it. I know that’s an old cliché, but it’s so so true. Be the strong one. Be in control and attractive. Do not sink and get sucked into a hole.

Nobody will be attracted to you then. Not even yourself.

9. Surrender

The panic subsides. You’re healing and know that your twin flame is healing. You have surrendered to a higher purpose and find trust in the universe again. There’s preparation for the return and it will happen in your journey when it’s supposed to happen. Not when you try to make it happen.

You’ve put your phone down. You no longer seek to find when they were last online. You’re no longer willing that text message or chance encounter in the street. There’s peace with yourself.

You’ve grown!

10. You have arrived!

You will become aligned as you’re both aware of the self-improvement that has taken place. You may still have short separations as the dust settles.

Now everything is laid out on the table. Worts and all. Barriers down. Trust is complete and fully there. The connection is powerful, you’re beyond living inside your own head.

You know how to love unconditionally. You’ve loved this person even through the separation and will always love them.

You can communicate telepathically. You’re awakened spiritually. They blow your chuffing mind – you can do anything!

Completely at peace with yourselves and each other. Two halves are now one and reaching beyond what we know as a happy relationship. It’s like #couplegoals on steroids. You’re in sync. I can tap into that energy – I’ve seen it – and I wish that I could plop what I see and feel it as into this paragraph. Or wish that I am an amazing author who can conjure magic with words. But I can’t and I’m not so you’ll have to expand your own energies into feeling it.

So yeh, it’s hard to get here but each stage has purpose. Some mind blowing, some excruciatingly painful. We become so that we can love ourselves, our bodies and others deeply and unconditionally.